We're switching careers...

We've switched careers...I have decided to no longer be a SAHM, Justin has decided to quit work as a Computer Consultant and Lauren has happily decided she no longer wants to be an infant...these are our new careers!

Check this link out to see what this Holiday season has in store for our family:

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1126511425.

Hehehehehe....had ya' fooled, eh?

Warning; Nekkid baby!

Our little Piddle Pot (emphasis on the Piddle) was diagnosed with Eczema a couple days ago after I noticed a red, irritated patch of skin on her "nether" region. After going to her Pedi's office, I was sent home with a prescription in hand and Doctor's orders to "air her buns out". I think if she was able to understand what the Dr. had ordered, she would have clobbered him and smothered him in wet, sloppy kisses because this child LOVES to be naked!

So this morning we stripped off her drawers and let her prance around the house. Sure, there was potty-proof pads scattered about the house, but as luck would have it, she decided against using the pads.

I turn away for one second and I see her scurrying away from where she was originally. And low and behold, my carpet looks like this:

Yep, that's a piddle mark. Lovely! So I head off to get the steam cleaner in the other room and she's decided she needed to poo and it looked like this:











Ha! I'm kidding, she didn't poop but I thought it might make you all lose your lunch if you anticipated seeing a poop stain on the carpet :)

Wednesday

When she's not hamming it up for the camera, or singing her opera songs like in the next two pictures, my favoritist girl is getting into anything and everything she comes across...hence, the purpose of this post.



In between the bouts of nausea, binge eating because I am STARVING lately, trips running to the Porcelain God for a barf break, moments of sheer ridiculousness where I cry for no reason at all other than being hormonal and pregnant, and the other billion stops along the way for a potty-party, I must chase Miss Fancy Pants around the house. Why you ask? Because she gets into everything...No really, I mean everything.

Take for example the tree...we had to move it to another less accessible part of the house because the minute she saw it, her little hiney crawled as quick as it could take her and within seconds, she was eating, wait-more like chowing down, on the brittle, nasty looking grass. You can see the grass all over the floor...she apparently thinks this looks nicer than clean, vacuumed carpet.



And when she's not eating the grass and gagging it out (because she hasn't quite figured out that after attempting to eat it dozens of times, its just not that good!) she goes in search of the ever disgusting toilet brush. And yeah, you all know what a toilet bowl scrubber looks like so I really didn't have to post a picture of it but after battling with it day after day, I decided it was worthy of a little blogger glory.



You wanted to see that, huh???

And then there's the dining room which is loaded with potential hazards for little girls like my Piddle Pot. There's the dogs water dish, the doggie door, the chairs (which she tries to pull herself up on and inevitably falls, screaming in frustration), the Sparklett's water container (where she has learned to pull up on the lever to make the water pour out-yeah loads o' fun!), the dog dishes with kibble inside and heck, she's probably found dangerous items that I'm not even aware of yet. So between these obstacles, we've decided to embrace our white trass-ness and bring in the dog's X pen. Now most people would resort to bringing in a cute little child safety gate, but not us...nah, we like to be different and hey, what's more classy than a hideous brassy dog gate in your dining room, eh?



And of course, when all else fails, Her Piddleness climbs. And climbs. And climbs some more on whatever her pudgy little legs take her too. She's climbed on the coffee table and Haltry (I think that's what its called) forever but for some reason, they never lose their appeal. And as much as I love the way the Haltry looks (thanks mom!), I am just hoping and praying that that corner doesn't one day jump out and hit her eye as she falls down :)



Yeah, she's super cute but what a handful!

HUGE news!

Not only does Lauren have a secret, we all have a secret that we have been dying to share...until now!!!

You saw the front of Princess Piddle Pot's shirt and now here's the back....

Are you ready???


Are you sure???


Positive???


Cause it's BIG news....



Okay, we have been dying to share the news with everyone so bear with me while I spill the beans again......

It's official....Lauren is going to be a big sister!!! We are SO excited and thrilled that another little Lauren or Justin Jr. will be joining our family! This was a huge shock at first but we are ready for this new little blessing to come and remind us what sleepless nights are like :)

The official due date for Baby Brownie (as my friend Sarah calls him/her) is June 30th, 2008. That means that our kiddos will be almost 16 months apart. Yay for 2 under 2! Better yet, yay for 2 in diapers..ha! Anyways, we had an Ultrasound a few weeks ago and the baby looked great...with a strong heartbeat and all!

Anyways, that's the newest news....I will be sure to fill you all in while things progress :)

Me? An addiction???

So I went to walmart.com a couple days ago and ordered all of the photos that have been accumulating in my computer files. Now, I realize I take a lot of pictures of my family (read: Lauren) but I really had no idea just how obsessive I was about documenting every.single.daily event in this little girls life. From eating cereal, to taking baths, to crawling and standing, to pooping (kidding, I'm not that wacko), I have a picture of every monumental (or not so monumental) task this child has accomplished. I guess it's the new mommy in me but I fear that future kiddos will get significantly less and less camera time that our Piddle Pot has. I mean, I could never keep up with the pace I'm snapping away at now...


Alright, once again I went off on a tangent because the purpose of this post was to tell you all that I had a total of 524 pictures that had to be developed. And unfortunately, this is the second batch of Lauren photos; the first set I bought were newborn Lauren pictures and I ordered 550+. My heart nearly sank when the grand Walmart total popped up on the screen because at the rate I'm going, I will have paid for her college tuition in pictures by the time she's three. Blah!


So I'm gonna admit it. My name is Shelly and I'm a photo-holic. When I want to take a picture of a new milestone or an outing or even a cute outfit, I can't just take one to the mark the occasion. Nooooo, I have to take 20 or 30 to capture every little emotion or face twitch or reaction....as was the case with this "photoshoot". Who knows what she was doing in this first picture, but as I have previously mentioned, I took a picture of the silly goose just....because :)


And when the Princess finally got bored from having a bazillion pictures taken outside, we moved into the house where the ultimate toy was found. As I have mentioned before, forget the toys designed for babies; musical, flashing and colorful toys mean absolutely nothing to this child. Yes, a Pampers box does the trick...every single time :)

What a cute newborn she was!

She had the cutest little button nose, a patch of dark brown hair and perfect pink lips that begged to be smooched. She was snuggly and cuddly and smelt like a baby...sweet and clean. She was so beautiful and perfect in every way (okay, almost). The problem with newborns though, is that they DON'T SLEEP at night! Argh, I remember getting up a million times a night to feed, soothe, feed, console, feed, rock, feed, replace her best friend (pacifier), feed, change her diaper, and yes, feed some more. I think I was awake more than I was sleeping. Boy I don't miss those sleepless nights.

My little Lauren now is no longer a newborn. She sits unassisted, crawls very fast, pulls herself up, babbles, eats finger foods, and entertains herself while mommy takes a shower. She is loads of fun and keeps me on my toes. The problems with infants though, is that 1) they are no longer interested in cuddling because they'd rather explore forbidden spots and 2) they are into everything. The dog bed is apparently tasty because she immediately eats it, the toilet bowl scrubber is prickly and fun to touch (yuck), and the door stoppers are beyond fascinating. You think you've baby-proofed your house and yet, she manages to find the one thing I've overlooked. However, unlike sweet cuddly newborns, infants SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT!

Uh huh. All night long. I am knocking on wood as I'm typing this, but my Princess Piddle Pot slept 10 (yes, ten!) whole hours for the past three nights. Now normally I would have blogged about it the first night it happened but I was terrified of jinxing myself and ending up with an infant that wakes 4+ times per night, so I've kept my trap shut...until now. Let me repeat myself because this my friends, is reason to celebrate! Lauren slept for 10 hours last night, and the night before and the night before. Ten blissful hours of non-interrupted, happily dreaming sleep. If that's not Heaven, I don't know what is.

Alright, I have to stop short and quit bragging. As I sit here and type, my fantastic 10 hour sleeper is frantically crawling to the trash can to locate any treasures mommy didn't sweep up. Fun!

Snuggly

Poor girl, she has a hard life.

She wrestled with the blankets, fought with her bears, whined for mommy to come and rescue her from her tortuous nap, and then finally gave in....Because when all else fails and you can't find a comfy spot, stick your butt into the air!

She is such a cute little snuggle bug...even if she resists naps and ends up becoming a fussy little monster by the end of the day :)

Another new trick!

I've contemplated pushing her down. But the thought of not earning the "Mother of the Year" award stopped me from nudging her cute lil' bum onto the floor. Nah really, I would never push her but man, I don't want her to stand! I mean, I do because it means she's thriving and healthy and heck, even smart because she's standing so early, but I really want her to remain my baby forever. Isn't there some kind of drug or chemical that you can give adorable, sweet babies from growing up into tantruming, terrible-two toddlers? Ugh...if not, I should invent one 'cause I know I'd be filthy stinkin' rich!

Look at those baby blues....totally keepers!

Within the past week, my Fancy Pants has begun pulling herself up on everything in sight. The couch, the bookcase, the Sparklett's water stand, the toilet (yeah, that's a new gross favorite)...heck, she'll even pull herself up onto you if you happen to be sitting down (that's what she's attempting to do in first the picture below). If she can see it and crawl to it, it's totally fair game.

Of course, no living room would be complete without a baby obstacle course! So with our Princess Piddle Pot in mind, Justin added a bar stool to the collection of "climb-able" objects. Who cares if our house has mounds of hurdles to climb over and barricades of cushions stacked to the ceiling? I mean, it's less you have to vacuum, right?!?

Did I mention just how much this girl loves to climb?


And when the barstool is no longer intriguing, climbing on daddy's head will do the trick. Heck, with a daddy as calm and sweet as Justin is, he'll even let you pull on his hair(!) so that you can catch your balance and pull yourself up. Yeah, thank God Justin has that kind of patience 'cause she would have been pushed down a looooooong time ago (still kidding!)


The thing about Lauren is that she's SO happy when she's on the move. She LOVES crawling and standing and getting into everything her nubby little fingers come across. She'll even sit and pose for you, which is probably due to the fact that mommy tells her how beautiful she is everyday. The girl can't help it...it's not her fault the camera loves her :)

Drive baby drive!

With a huge trailer in our driveway, a hideous dirt track race car in our garage and gallons of oil and other car crap that has stained our once-white driveway, I think it's safe to assume that our family has a little bit of white trash in us :) What car obsessed, engine-fuel-lovin' kind of family isn't? I'd love nothing more than to blame it on my husband but who am I kidding? I love the dirt track just as much as he does...I just hate to get my nails dirty! So I sit in the stands with the other white trash, beer-drinkin' toothless folks and cheer my husband on while he kicks some Hillybilly booty! Haha!

So is it any surprise that our daughter has inherited some of these less-than-stellar qualities? Can I help it that the child likes the racetrack like her mommy and daddy do?!?! I mean, I gave her the option of which shirt she'd like to wear and being the Brown that she is, she chose this one and made her daddy grin with pride:


For those of you who may not recognize the Redneck racing symbol, those are checkered flags on her shirt. I couldn't resist buying the onesie and, being the sweety that she is, she happily "agreed" to sport her daddy's favorite baby girl article of clothing. Here's a closeup of what it says:

"Future Dirt Track Racing Star", complete with hot pink stars, purple letters and the all-important checkered flags. But don't worry...we haven't gone overboard yet. She's got a helmet lined up, fire-proof racing gear in size 6-9 months and a booster seat to reach the steering wheel, but we haven't actually gone out and bought her a car yet :) But when we do, you can bet it will be decked out with pink, purple and have a giant crown on the hood because afterall, she is our little Princess Piddle Pot :)